"If you don't have big breasts, put ribbons in your pigtails."

So begins Use What You've Got & Other Business Lessons I Learned From My Mom by Barbara Corcoran, NYC real estate diva and founder of the Corcoran Group. I love reading books by and about successful women, as I know I have a lot to learn from my elders. I also love a good rags to riches story. Corcoran's rise from poor, bucktoothed Jersey girl to savvy, NYC business woman was not without struggling, backstabbing, and near meltdowns.

The book got me thinking: What have I learned from my mom that has gotten me this far? What lessons will guide me even farther?

1) Be aggressive and go after what you want.
I don't consider myself either overly passive or overly aggressive (and I detest the thought of being passive-aggressive), but when I want something, I go after it. I'd wanted to move to NYC after college since I was 13. The housing situation, job, and relocation all happened with a whole lotta 'splainin' to do. My mom has often said, "Now is NOT the time to be shy." I need to listen to her more often.

2) Don't be afraid to get dirty - you're washable.
Life is messy, and I don't just mean this literally. Should you try to keep tidy, you will realize at some point that you have yet to live. Nothing worthwhile is easily attainable. Some of the best things that will ever happen to me are going to complicate things and muss my hair. But that's okay. This is why I try to jam pack each day with so much activity, why I can't go to bed early, why I've done less than practical things just to have a good story to tell. If I get hurt or dirty, I'm always washable.

3) Make your own inspiration.
My mom doesn't wait. She's always had various lists of goals and ideas. She strives to be better, not because she's competing with others, but because she knows she can. My dad sent me a one-line email a few weeks before Christmas. It said, "You can't wait for inspiration. You have to chase after it with a stick." It's true. I need routines to actualize my potential. I need to search for new ideas and experiences. I need to make it my life's goal to stay open and receptive to all the possibilities...and to carry a big stick.

4) Don't compromise your true self to be liked or popular.
Now you know I don't do that! My opinions are sometimes misconstrued, but sometimes they aren't, and people still think I'm too snarky and cynical and haughty. Check, check, and check! I can't be glib and cloying about things that I know are more complex or sinister. I can't go along with the crowd, and anyway, I don't always enjoy the company. And my sense of humor tends to be a bit dark, yes. I was scolded a few times as a kid for my smart mouth, but what could be expected? I'm borne of sass. Mine is a very extreme case of "she get it from huh mama." Besides, my mom said people would like me more and I'll be happier when I'm myself. I believe her.