I've seen two odd slogan tees on some fellow New Yorkers in the last week.

One was on a very small child. It was similiar to those "Call 1-800-Grandma" shirts that are generally supposed to validate primary caretakers, rather than describe the child. They're emblazoned with messages like "My Mom's Hot" or "I Love My Daddy." This one read, "WORKING MOMS RULE!" I thought it was a pretty poignant sign of the times. I have had a working mom for most of my life, but yeah, who buys that for their kid? Someone feeling barely-masked guilt, thus leading to their need for validation, or someone proud of the fact that they pay someone else to take care of their offspring during the day? Someone who thinks that being a mom shouldn't be one's sole occupation and wants other people to know that? I'd have asked the source, but the caretaker was a nanny. Obviously.

The other shirt was in the same vein as those tight "Hottie" and "Sexy" shirts with bubble letters or some whimsical font. The shirt read, "I am not opinionated." That was it. I thought there might be some punchline on the back of the shirt, but there wasn't. I think these shirts are supposed to be funny, and this one, like most, falls short of that goal. Of course, it could be ironic. The voluptuous girl spilling out of the tee might be an indomitable opinion spitter. And of course, to say one is opinionated or not, isn't that an opinion? Maybe that would only work with an adverb somewhere in there: "I am annoyingly opinionated"or "I am reasonably opinionated." Or can you prove the existence of opinions (or not) as fact, thus not making it an opinion? Yeah, I'm pretty sure the sentence is a fact, not an opinion. Here's another fact, err opinion: That shirt is stupid.